On the contraceptive implant
It has now been exactly three months since I had the contraceptive implant inserted for the first time, so I thought I would reflect on my experience so far.
As a particularly squeamish patient, prior to the (very quick) procedure, my main anxieties revolved around not fainting in the nurse’s office. As a result, I had failed to properly research what I was getting myself in for. As far as I was concerned, the implant was an easy form of contraception that would immediately stop my periods for three years and not have any impact whatsoever on any other part of my body, (obviously I wasn’t quite so naively optimistic, but I did go into it very blindly).
Now, this is by no means a deterrent to anyone considering getting the implant. With 99% effectiveness as a contraception, it’s free and easy insertion on the NHS and the positive impact it can have on those with particularly heavy and/or painful periods, it is one of the best options out there.
However, it would be remiss of me to simply list all of the positives, as the past three months have been tumultuous to say the least. In a fit of hormone-driven rage I listed my negative experiences of the implant on my phone (whilst sat on a train and crying for no reason), which I thought I would share:
1. Anger – Having never been a person to experience anger really at all, this has certainly been a new experience for me. And to my poor friends and family, sorry guys. I have found myself being hit with the most irrational and unfounded bursts of rage which are terrifying for everyone involved and are often brought about by absolutely nothing.
2. Weight gain – This was the side effect I was most cautious of. Having not done my research prior to insertion, I more than made up for it immediately after, frantically Googling and convincing myself that I was going to gain 5 stone. Now, gaining weight is by no means a bad thing. However, as a twenty-something with a residual 14-year-old-who-thinks-Kendall-Jenner-is-the-standard-of-beauty mindset, the threat of weight gain, I’m ashamed to say, rocks me to my core. Truthfully, I don’t think I have gained (or lost) any noticeable amount of weight over the past three months. However, my brain has been convincing me otherwise, which leads me on to my next point…
3. Body image – As a pretty body-confident person, the change in the way that I feel about myself over the past few months has certainly come as a surprise. My initial thought was “I may gain a few pounds but I’m confident and intelligent enough to know that it’s okay and I’m still beautiful.” Unfortunately, this has quickly become “oh my god I’ve gained 5000 pounds and I look awful.” I have managed to gaslight myself into thinking that I have gained a significant amount of weight. Brilliant. I think my rampant Googling gave me a set of expectations which, true or not, I have not dealt with well.
4. My period – I have had my period for four easy days every month since I was 11, and don’t get me wrong, I know how lucky I am. I have friends whose periods are so painful that they become disabling, and others who cannot get their periods at all. So to have such a consistent and relatively pain-free cycle is an immense blessing. However, since getting the implant my period has been so unpredictable that I have avoided any light-coloured clothing (fortunately, its winter in the UK), for fear of having an accident. I am now on week three of my current period, and I have absolutely no idea when it may finish. This is not only uncomfortable (bloating), painful (cramps), wardrobe-limiting (I’m running out of dark trousers) but also expensive (sanitary products are extortionate). To be honest, the period itself isn’t the worst part, it’s the uncertainty of when it may come and go that I find so anxiety inducing.
5. Mental health – As somebody who has experienced and dealt with bouts of anxiety, I have built up my ‘toolbox’ which enables me to cope with, anticipate and prevent feelings of anxiety. As a result, my anxiety has been very manageable over the past couple of years and, overall, I’m a pretty contented person. But the implant has thrown this somewhat out of the window. My mental health has followed an acutely ‘up and down’ pattern over the past three months and the unpredictability of it only makes me feel more anxious – it’s a very vicious cycle.
So, tempted? I appreciate that this has not been the most glowing review, but I’m going for honesty over advertisement. The truth is I’m not too worried, from my extensive (and borderline obsessive) research, the side effects of the implant tend to settle down after a few months. For those side effects which don’t dissipate, the pros generally outweigh the cons, i.e., at least for those using the implant mainly as contraception, you may experience moderate mood swings, but you are almost 100% protected from getting pregnant.
This post is, selfishly, nothing more of an angry rant from an overly hormonal 20-something. However, it is impossible to have a truthful discussion about the contraceptive options without feeling an overwhelming sense of imbalance in the conversation between men and women. It is so frustratingly unjust that, in order to reap the so-called “rewards” of birth control, we must accept the never-ending list of symptoms and side-effects that we have to suffer through, meanwhile the options that are available to men are so limited.